Differently Abled Nutrition- A Review

TITLE        : Differently Abled Nutrition
AUTHOR   : Lutgard Musiime
GENRE      : Non fiction

Differently Abled Nutrition is an educative book by Lutgard Musiime speaking on Differently Abled children, disabilities,misconceptions,challenges and also how to feed them effectively so they can grow to their fullest.

I have to confess this is a first of it’s kind for me. A topic i had not given much thought to but by now am convinced nutrionists are onto something.
Lutgard does amazing breaking down what disability is, understanding the different challenges faced and how we can manage these difficulties among the differently abled children.

I read this book in a hospital waiting room.Talk about perfect setting!
I mentioned this because of how it’s simply written and easy to read and understand.
It has scientific terms that could have got anyone scurrying but it’s really well explained plus it’s only 9chapters ,97pages.

I would like to believe each one has interacted or been near distance with a child who is differently abled.
Lutgard shares on how she started on this nutrition journey, her experiences which are quite relatable and the many misconceptions society holds and still does.
Safe to say reactions do indeed range from Denial, Anger, Fear, Grief etc as broken down in the book.
Lutgard strives to bridge the gap and show you disability is a normal part of human diversity.

As I mentioned earlier ,it definitely an educative one, kind where you pause and take notes.

Have you ever thought of how food gets to you stomach?
For children it’s gradual and with knowledge your able to know what to feed a child with different abilities at whatever stage of their lives.

I had to highlight this;
The first 1000days of a child are a time of trendmous potential and enormous vulnerability.
Poor nutrition in the first 1000days can cause irreversible damage to a child’s growing brain.

Halfway the book I was looking forward to the practical bit and she did it.
The last two chapters have a Food Diary and also a 20day Feeding Challenge which I believe is applicable for any household.

If you are a parent, know a parent (obviously).
Buy, Bless someone with a copy.

Would I recommend the book?
Yes, I highly recommend it.

Grab a copy at 40,000ug shs or 12dollars.
As we await for them in all major book stores in Kampala
Contact Lutgard on +256787817280

Or on her  social media handles
Twitter; @akiikilutgard
Facebook and Instagram; Musiime Lutgard Akiiki

Faces behind Family Series. (Finale)

When we were younger we thought we would grow up and not have to be vulnerable but now we know to grow up is to accept vulnerability to live is to be vulnerable.~Renee Brown~

Thank you to each and everyone that shared a part of their lives in this family series.
A glimpse of innocence, vulnerability, growth, love and a place of connection.

As I officially bring the series to a close I thought it best to show off all the people that took, most are writers, bloggers with platforms driven to a purpose and invited us into their own lives.
I approached most of them to be a part because of the content they put out there and I hope you can be blessed by what they have to say too.

Words make worlds and today I invite you into their Worlds.
Follow their platforms and be blessed.

Justine Love Nuwamanya

Is a creative, mentor and administrator who is sold out to helping people and systems perform better through her various capabilities.

She is also a blogger and her site is named WORDS FROM THE POT @ https://justynlove.wordpress.com/ where she writes to inspire, encourage, share love  and life lessons with the world. All this she does to help make the world a better place through telling stories of transformation.

Shadray

I am motivated towards making people fall in love with being in the right kind of love, appreciate relationships, life & the beauty that comes with all of it.

https://randomthoughtsofshadray.wordpress.com

Takudzwanashe

Takudzwanashe is a young female creative and if you struggle to pronounce her name you can call her  The Baobab. The left-hander from Zimbabwe writes about anything that pops in her mind with a range of topics which include  mental health, book reviews,words of affirmation, appreciating music from the legends…..
Don’t forget to follow her podcast  https://anchor.fm/the-baobab and her blog  https:tcndangana.wordpress.com

Casa Kato

Casa is a Ugandan born blogger who shares his personal experiences with a vision to Inspire, influence and build confidence to those who have lost it before.
Topics mainly revolve around love, family, friendship.

Find him on https://casaldotonline.wordpress.com

Wonani

https://doseofwonani.com/

Dose of Wonani is not fully bound by any particular theme and is a pure reflection of life through a twenty-something year old; Random. Despite this, the heart behind every published post remains the same. To share life with you, the mistakes, the failures and even the good times and share the lessons learnt along the way. The blog is the perfect prescription for those who are just trying to figure life out.

Kevman

http://thekevmanexpress.wordpress.com

On his blog he writes social commentary, humor, short stories and sometimes a moment of poetry.

Rachel Jesuseme hailing from Nigeria, a wife, mother and with a heart of share.

The Seme’s Nooks Blog is born out of the desire to share stories and life experiences and helping people heal through them. You can be part of The Tribe at https://www.semesnooks.com

blog is amarionline.wordpress.com

Sue. N is Zimbabwean born ,a wife, mother , blogger at Amari. Amari is a place of growth, healing and self discovery, and as I explore my journey  it will serve as a journal I am leaving behind for my daughter. My hope being one day she will be able to find advice, opinions and a feel of who her mother is when the time is right. Just in case I am not there with her.

Tikia Joella, a mother, very passionate about Jesus and loves to write.
Her blog entails bits and pieces of a memoir, devotions and she hopes your perspective can change through her sharings.
Follow her on
http://tikiawithgrace.com/about/

Onyinye Udeh a Nigerian fun loving wife, mother, writer commonly known as Tory Teller.
She believes her blog is a space in the universe to give a listening ear.
She shares stories from her experience hoping we learn, unlearn and keep learning and become better members in the society.

Follow her on https://www.torytellersblog.com/?m=1

Andida Crisper a devout christian, practicing engineer by day , Ghost writer most times and also CEO of the Andida Nation a platform aimed at tackling identity crisis,shaping generations by the Word of God.

Catch her on Instagramhttps://instagram.com/theeandinda_nation?utm_medium=copy_link

Hope your common days were turned into thanksgiving days through this series. Thank you for walking this journey with us.

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Family is Family

It was after reading a whole long post that my sister had written on family that got me wondering how relatable this could be for anyone out there.
It’s in our conversation that I realized the frustrations that the people carry don’t differ much.
We have to admit family is one of the things that can frustrate you to an end and yet we cannot avoid it.

Firstly am super grateful and humbled by those who chose to share their stories with me ,we got to see different kinds of people, family dynamics, upbringing, understanding of family etc.
I mean from people being brought up by guardians, single parenting, extended families,nuclear families doing family from across nations, mothers ,wives and so many more.

This also opened my eyes to how much understanding one ought to carry towards other people. Never to assume your family is like any other.
Start with this family series, 11entries and all technically different families.

Family is diverse and so many topics one could cover but I chose to revolve around the pandemic because it’s most recent and it has shaken many of us into spaces we had looked over.

I find family important but I have not always treated it that way.
To know and to do are entirely different pictures it’s the pandemic that pushed me to a place of seeing the beauty of what family represents, what support looks like, what acceptance looks like, what together entails, what real fights entail even got me screaming on top of my voice sometime , That making up can sometimes look like making breakfast or opening a door, what mourning together looks like, Celebrating each milestone, Watching Olympics even when you have no idea what’s happening.

What am I saying?
That Family is Gods gift to you and you ought to recognize it.
Did you always see it?

I also understand your family will not look like the next door neighbors and it’s alright.
And it gets me thinking even you don’t look like everyone in your household so what’s the fuss.
Have we set a higher standard for Family?
They can’t fail, they can’t disappoint, they cannot forget and yet somehow those outside family are allowed to and forgiven.

Speaking on the Pandemic and Technology. These worked like family trying to find a footing in an unknown surrounding.

Pandemic got many of us utilising technology resources we never could have thought of ,if not being hauled up for a number of weeks with restrictions in movements.
I mean you are reading a blog that was non existent before the pandemic not even in my dreams, I finally got around to use zoom, Microsoft teams etc , Podcasts are a real treat now.
Technically we travel around the world in days , months we shall soon be speaking of years.

It’s only fair that I tickle your mind on thinking of your travels around the world. Did you remember to play within your compound?
To play from so far away and yet not tend to those next to you ought to disturb you.
We are far more aware of what’s international, national than whats in your own household.
We can easily miss the real life opportunities to be present with our families.
Take time to look around you and indulge.
They are with you for but a time.

I once wrote a little something on entitlement you can find it here https://behindclosedscreens.wordpress.com/2020/12/26/entitled-much/

Its true we feel so entitled that we have unspoken expectations on family that cause us frustrations without us fully processing where it’s coming from.

Family is made of different individuals hence individuality is something that we ought to learn to extend towards family .
For instance I have a sister whose very different from me which I have come to appreciate.
I have low tolerance for time keeping while she happens to do everything at her pace so if you expecting time adjusting on her end for you ,you might be in for a whole lot of disappointment.
I now know better and I have gradually devised ways to deal with it.

You know how you know your friends so well and know exactly how to treat them. That’s it. Extend the same grace towards family.
They are different people continually changing, growing and a whole lot of life happening their end too.

What would I hope you pick from this family series?

Family is Family and it’s for everyone.

God chose that kind of family for you and you are a gift to them too, embrace it and work at it.

Family requires as much effort as you would put in any area of your life, different relationships, career etc.

Family is made up of individuals treat them as such not as a whole pack.

Family thrives on love and we cannot love well if we haven’t understood the one who made love.

Family constantly changes the ones there today may not always be there ,time will come when it’s all but memories or rather you a memory. Create memories it’s everything.

Having somewhere to go is home. Having someone to love is family and having both can be a blessing.

Family also means you will love and be loved for the rest of your life.

There is no fool who is disowned by his family.
~African proverb

Other things may change us but we start and end with family.
~Anthony Brandt ~

Thank you for walking this journey with us and for those that shared with us a part of their lives we appreciate and are humbled.

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Family- A Covid 19 Tale

Tory and her children

Growing up in an extended family home made me fall in love with my family relatives and all those around me and it won’t be wrong to say that this shaped my perspective about family and what it entails.

There was a certain time when I was young and living with my parents that we had 17 people in my family house so I have always been used to being around many people. This should not come as a surprise to you because we are Africans and it is in our nature to always connect and relate with close and extended family members.
Then my mum used to cook for every single person and that included me, my siblings, my uncles, and their family to mention but a few and we all lived under the same roof.

Now I am a mum and I have grown up with the values that were inculcated in me from my childhood days living with my parents.

During the time of COVID-19 in 2020, it was indeed a trying time for me and my family. My husband and I are career-driven people so when the lockdown was initiated by the government for us to stay at home during that time we didn’t really know what was going to happen.
All we knew was that we needed to stock up the house with food stuff so that we would not run out of supply or have a need to leave the house since everywhere had been shut down.
Initially, it was like we were on leave from work so it gave us ample time to get some rest and spend time together as a family but as days became weeks and weeks turned into months we were no longer at ease.

Naturally, my husband is an outdoor person and though we share similarities here I still enjoyed being home, so it didn’t take long for him to start feeling uncomfortable and wanting to go out.

Two things scared me most during the pandemic; the first was running out of food stuff and having to go to look for where to get, eventually this did not happen because somehow we had stocked up enough. And everything we needed was available, we were financially drained.

The second thing that scared me was when my husband informed me one day that he couldn’t identify the taste of a meal I had just prepared.
At first, it seemed as though he had a bad cold which was affecting his taste but not long after his sense of smell was also affected. Out of curiosity, I went online to reconfirm what I had heard about the symptoms of the COVID-19 virus.
To my greatest surprise, loss of sense of taste and smell were one of them. To say I was scared would be an understatement.
When I asked him about all the other symptoms he responded in the negative because he wasn’t feverish or having any other discomfort.

In all sincerity, I was as frightened as a mouse who had encountered a cat.
I tried as much as possible to stay calm at least for the sake of my children but I also had to give him my support.
The worst case was that hospitals were a no-go area with all the scary information that we were hearing every day I knew that we couldn’t afford to gamble with his health by going to the hospital.
So we made a few calls to friends in the Medical Profession and we were given some prescriptions which he started immediately.

Despite my fear, I had to give him all the support that I could and also try as much as possible to shield my kids from finding out what was going on with their dad.
Till date, none of my immediate family members knows about this incident because we decided to keep it to ourselves and handle it together. It took almost 2 months before he regained his sense of smell and taste and boy, I was the happiest person alive.

So the pandemic came and went and we were able to pull through eventually I resumed work after the lockdown was lifted but my husband still works from home till date. I look forward to the day when the Corona virus would permanently become a thing of the past.

Meet Tory Teller a Nigerian fun loving Writer, Wife, Mother.
She shares alot of her experiences in the most humourous ways and believes her blog is a space in the universe for a listening ear.
Find a reason to smile and follow her blog here https://www.torytellersblog.com/?m=1

Thank you for following the family series this far.
In a time of test try family.
~C~

Family :Love The Only Reason

When I think about a family or a home two important things come into my mind; one being that a family derives its definition from the relationship that one carries with it, and two that family’s definition is dependent on the time(age) at hand.

We probably know or have heard of people who do not believe in family and don’t even think of having one because of their past; at the time they felt they needed them the most they seemed to turn their back on them whilst a close friend was unto them a shoulder to cry on.
We also know those who went through hell, but their family carried them through the end.

These two experiences for both people create a different understanding, and probably even a paradigm shift.
Since communication is, and will always be one of the most important aspects for a relationship of any kind to flourish, it would do me good to use it as a case study on the impact of the evolution of times on family.

Back in the day, people used riddles, proverbs to teach their children some of which were meant to instill a certain fear in them to revere some things simply because they lacked a proper language to understand each other, for example people were always told that something bad would happen if they sat on a mortar but really that was to keep food as clean as possible.
With the birth of the new age, as education was introduced, people were enlightened, their eyes were opened and they began to question some of these things as much as they could reason them out.

As a result, some things were disregarded because their minds had changed which created a cultural gap, whereby there is a group that believes that something terrible hangs on sitting on a mortar and another that seem not understand the mortar’s relationship with the stopping of blood flow in the human body.

The new age arrived fully clad in technology, which came holding in its hands as many associates to distribute as possible, that it would take only those that have received their better share to understand another in the same boat as them.
Because of all this, some cannot find the freedom to share their innermost thoughts because perhaps they are not sure if they would still be the sweet little princess.

However, the “good news” is that technology seemed to give as many solutions as family could give.
Facebook feels like home to some whereby they have the liberty to say anything and someone will understand them from whence them are speaking, that feeling is undeniably good, google makes one question the function of certain relationships because well, every question past, present and future is well answered with guaranteed privacy.

However, technology can seem to be the good guy in the story, but it will never match the loud laughs on a Sunday evening at sunrise in the compound when everyone came together to listen and tell stories about things, when everyone was genuinely happy and felt like they belong.
The times when people drank porridge from the same bucket, when problems had genuine answers because they knew each other quite well, those times when the elderly spent time imparting timeless wisdom to the young, the walks they had through their coffee plantations as they took them through a school called life.
The honesty that hit their hearts with love that shifted them to another realm where their conversations were silence, the transformation of mindset that followed after that, none can match that.

Question is, What next?

A family is the smallest institution of the society, yet the most powerful.
It is the silent yet salient unit of our life, it is the microcosm of the macrocosm, it is the first school for every human being.

All manner of people once belonged under the care of someone and oh! how great time it was to instill the traits that should in them, that would later bring a transformation everywhere they went.

Imagine a time when parents treat their children with more grace as a plant that grows deeply rooted in love, with leaves which are ever green in and out season, tenderly sprouting to provide shade to all kinds of people for many generations.

Love, is the only foundation that cannot be broken therefore with all that we do, we should never lose that place because love never dies but rather keeps going to the end, it isn’t self-centered, it doesn’t keep the score of other people’s sins.
It is therefore important to say that, we should not do anything for anybody even the slightest of things, just because they are family, but rather because we love them.

In conclusion, it is everyone’s responsibility to still make their family as comfortable, as comfortable can go.
Perhaps there is more work that will be required for that, but it’s worth it.
Just like any kind of relationship, a family is an investment that leaves an everlasting mark not only to those who belong there, but also those they will meet along their way. Ladies and gentlemen, love is the only reason.

Ps: Family is Family we all came from one no matter which way it looks like.
This Family Series was inspired by the same writer on this and voila happens to be my little sister.
I thought ..why not hear from different people and their experiences and we are amazed at the response and trust given forth.
Take away all possessions and we are left with one structure held together by love. Family.

Meet Andida Crisper a devout christian, practicing engineer by day , Ghost writer most times and also CEO of the Andida Nation a platform aimed at tackling identity crisis,shaping generations by the Word of God.

Catch her on Instagram

https://instagram.com/theeandinda_nation?utm_medium=copy_link

Family and the Pandemic 9

I think I would describe family as a place where the heart is, Family is home.
I grew up in a nuclear home setting.
My parents are separated (7 years) and I am a single mum with 1 child living with my mum and siblings.

Before the pandemic the family had sort of grown apart because after the separation of my parents we lived separately, actually it was me that moved out.

The pandemic happened when I was 3 months into motherhood and we had all moved in together by then in a new house. 
I can say we have grown closer together.
We established a family altar that has been the highlight of the season.
We have all grown spiritually because of the pandemic.

Personally the pandemic was a blessing since I was a new mother when it started  and had already decided to be a  stay home mom  for the first  2 years of my childs life.
My daughter is my priority now and so I have had to think out of the box on how to make money from home.

With the pandemic the dynamics have changed and now there is a whole load of opportunity to work from home. That has worked in my favor. Now I can be able to spend time with my child and still be able to make money.

I believe we all have different personalities and therefore react / respond differently to situations and so I have learned to adapt to the different dynamics of my family members and that has made co existing them a little easier.
It’s not easy to be stuck with family for months they can drive you crazy.

So when I became a mum, I realised that children  learn from what they see and so i have been intentional about goal setting and chasing.
Am also working on being the best version of myself so my siblings and baby can pick a leaf.

I also learned a long time ago to put my expectations with God.
Because i put my expectations in God’s  hand and I have learned to accept my family the way it is, whether they come through or not I will always love them.

Support from family comes in all aspects, physical emotional and financial.

I have also realized family cuts across it’s more than just blood , sometimes our friends are more closer to us than our actual family.  Personally technology has made it possible to relate with people from all over the world. For example my best friend lives in Zimbabwe I would never have met her if there was no internet. 

But Social media as a form of technology can be a recipe for disaster if someone lacks emotional intelligence.
I feel like social media bends reality and we are influenced to want unrealistic lifestyle that eventually leads to mental health issues. I think social media is a big trigger for mental health issues.

Speaking on conflict and resolutions among family;
There will always be conflict were humans exist, to overcome we must learn to die to offense and also be deliberate about knowing your people so you can reduce conflict.
It’s all about sacrifice, communication and understanding the individuality of your family members

Individuality can be respected and nutured when we learn to speak the love language of each member my first love language is words of affirmation and I feel that each time I have been affirmed I have grown.  And so I do the same for the next person.

Some things families may need for it to thrive, grow towards the right direction include
 
Peace, Patience, Kindness, Generosity, Faithfulness, Gentleness, Self-control…”
The fruits of the holy spirit are what any family needs to thrive.
Once a family’s foundation is in Christ then they are heading the right direction.

Thank you for following the family series. We see you and we are grateful.
There is something about reading with your heart.

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Family and the Pandemic 8

Hallo,thank you for accepting to take part in the family blog series.
So tell us, What  do you think makes a family?

Love, understanding and sacrifice.

How would you best describe your family?

Fun, loving and warm.

What kind of family structure do you come from?

LOL, where do I start? Nuclear then extended then blended.

What are your earliest memories of home?

This white passage/corridor I used to scribble on (an get scolded for) and parents bedroom door. Don’t ask me why I don’t know either.

What do you most enjoy and appreciate about your family?

The one I came from made me who I am and the one I started gives me confidence to be who I am.

If you had a problem, Would you reach out to a friend or family member first and Why?

Family members. They are my support system.

Let’s talk about navigating Family during the pandemic.

What positive and negative impact has this had on you and family ?

I got to hear my husband’s work voice lol.
On a more serious note, I got to spend more time with my family and I loved it.

The negative was we would sometimes rub each other the wrong way. Not too much but it did happen.

Would you consider that you have grown closer or apart from family during the pandemic?

I would say closer. It has been hard and we have been through a lot but yeah we are closer.

Where have you put unrealistic expectations on your family?

I think with our goals like cars, houses etc but I realised we need to work towards it and do our best, no pressure.
Pressure equates to frustration and that causes serious and unnecessary cracks in households.

Where have they put unrealistic expectations on you?

I think it’s more expectations I put on my self for the sake of the family. I expect to be superwoman.

Has your family let you be a grown up or they are still treating you like a child?

They were forced to lol. They treat me like a grown up now.

If you are a parent how have you respected your children individuality?

My child is still quite young, I just let her be.
I am very aware of the things she takes great interest in and when she is a bit older will help her hone in on those interests.

Think of one thing that you said you would never do and you do it now.

Sound like my mom lol.

Think of one thing you said you would always do and don’t do it now.

Chase a 9-5. And I am very content with that decision.

In what ways has family shown you support  or not during the pandemic?

We have been each other’s support through it all.

Being stuck together/alone in the same space for a long period of time has its own challenges.
How have have you been intentional with having a time out?

I haven’t really but I try to read when I can as a way of self care.

Does technology play a healthy or unhealthy role in your family?

50-50 my husband and I seem to have a unwritten rule with our devices and TV.
We always know when it’s enough.

Give a short distinct description of what family time may look like in your household.

It’s probably chill time in front tof the TV, probably  watching a cartoon flick Or some time at the park but since covid this has turned to drives around the neighborhood.

Describe a recent time you were angry at a family member and how did you handle it ?

Actually a couple of days ago, I forgot something (like I always do) and my husband wasn’t too happy about it because it hinders both our work.
I didn’t take the criticism too well but we eventually made amends.

Were you more intentional about spending time together?

Yes. We always do.

How have you grown over the time you spent during lockdown?

I think it made me more aware of myself.
It also helped me dealt with some unresolved issues I had from my childhood. It gave me time to introspect.

Mention at least one way you have treated friends better than family.

I think I am alway ready to lend a helping hand where I can.

What would you choose to make more time for?

For myself and things I love. I feel lost in all the roles I play sometimes I forget to take care of me.

Do they call you by your name or you have a nickname? Do you like it or you just bear with it?

My name is short so mostly by my name. The nicknames I had I didn’t really like but they fell away and I grew older.

Lastly I saw this Tik tok trend ,walk into your home stretch your hands out to any family member you meet and see their reaction.
It’s either a hug or kicks and punches.
It would be interesting to find out.

Hugs in my household. Always hugs.

Family is Family and I hope you enjoying walking through different homesteads and experiences.
No posts on the Weekends. Feel free to catch up with what you missed.
Yesterday post https://behindclosedscreens.wordpress.com/2021/09/02/family-and-the-pandemic-7/

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Family and the Pandemic 7

Hallo, thank you for accepting to take part in the family blog series.
So tell us, what do you think makes a family?

Biologically, its people of the same blood lineage (mother, father, brothers, sisters, cousins, nieces, nephews, grannies & the like) yet still, on the streets, a family is made up of people connected by and for the hustle.
They roll together to make it through life.

How would you best describe your family?

I come from the best extended family there ever been.
Raised by my aunt whose family got my back from day one, I became the sixth child.

What kind of family structure do you come from?

I grew up at my aunt’s home because my parents had separated when I was young so that makes it an extended family.
However, I am in close contact with both of my biological parents & we talk regularly.

What are your earliest memories of home?

My earliest recollection of home is at my grandmother’s.
A village home with a big garden and compound basking in its former glory. I was the only child at hers along with two of my uncles I didn’t blend well with because they were grown and there was nothing much to talk about with them. It was pretty much lonely.

Going back to answer of question three, when my parents separated, my grandmother took me in and after some time, my aunt picked me up and took me into hers till I was old enough to start my own life.

What do you most enjoy and appreciate about your family?

So, when I became a part of my aunt’s family, that’s where all my other definitions of a family come into play. My family is one.
We never leave any man behind and we will always look out for each other all the time.

You got a problem? Tell us, we’ll figure out a way. You got some good news popping? Tell us and we pop Champagne. That’s our family.

Unless if you really show you want to be a lone wolf, that’s when they will let you face the heat but at any one time you feel like the world you wanted to feel good about over them has beaten you, they will welcome you back and polish you up.
That didn’t stop only under our roof.
We did it for the neighbours and every other person who was genuine to us and it spread to us that we (the children) grew up with a lot of empathy that we feel a lot for so many people out there that we easily offer help.
But that only works if you show that you’re genuine because people easily take advantage of such scenarios.

If you had a problem, would you reach out to a friend or family member first and Why?

That depends on what particular kind of problem. There are some problems that need family to come in and there are some that need friends to come in.
I wish I could bring a perfect example but I am one who rarely reaches out for help.

However, if the problem is of a huge financial issue, I think I would ask family for help easier because they’re more likely to understand my situation than friends. small financial problems can be solved by friends.

Let’s talk about navigating Family during the pandemic.

What positive and negative impact has this had on you and family?

The pandemic didn’t in any way affect me and my family (not that I noticed any).
We communicated when we needed to as we always been doing (business as usual).

Would you consider that you have grown closer or apart from family during the pandemic?

Relating to question one, our relationship as family was never shaken.

Where have you put unrealistic expectations on your family?

None. I am more of an independent person so I don’t usually expect stuff from people.

Where have they put unrealistic expectations on you?

My biological parents want me to go to Dubai so that I make more money.
It puts me on pressure because it makes me feel like I am failing at life (psychological games).
At times feel like they’re quite true though, that life is moving slow here in Uganda for me though I constantly feel there is a big break coming my way.

Has your family let you be a grown up or they are still treating you like a child?

It depends on the situation at hand.
In some instances, they treat me like a child especially about instances concerning personal growth.

They really want to see growth and any time you’re slacking, there is someone hitting you up to ask what’s going on.
But all in all, they let you be as long as you’re alive and kicking.

Think of one thing that you said you would never do and you do it now.

Yes, I’ve thought about it, thank you.
But you didn’t tell me to tell it to you. However, I’ll tell you anyway.

I thought I would never watch series.
I used to see guys fretting about waiting for long periods for the next seasons and some were canceled.
Damn, I never saw myself going through that nonsense, but now, here I am, going through that nonsense (but it’s still a struggle though).

Think of one thing you said you would always do and don’t do it now.

I thought I would forgive a particular ex of mine in case she came back to apologize because I was sure she would and indeed she did, got back together but later i realized my heart was still not through with it.
I thought I would love her forever; it was a lie. Love is, I was made to believe.

In what ways has family shown you support or not during the pandemic?

My family has shown me support all the way. They emphasized that I always communicate regularly so that they know how I am coping.
One of them offered me a lockdown gig that helped me afford my rent bills. He could have got any one else to do it but I was considered first and I did it perfectly well.

Being stuck together/ alone in the same space for a long period of time has its own challenges.
How have you been intentional with having a time out?

I am mainly an indoors person usually inside watching movies, sleeping or writing stuff.
But I occasionally step out to go jogging or holla at friends in the complex just so that people don’t think I died inside.

Does technology play a healthy or unhealthy role in your family?

It plays a healthy role.

Give a short distinct description of what family time may look like in your household.

In my family, now that we have scattered each to their own house because of personal growth and what not, we usually still go back to our old folks’ home on weekends to give them company and catch up with their life, seek clarity and or guidance on certain issues as well maintain the bond.

Describe a recent time you were angry at a family member and how did you handle it?

None comes to mind that’s worth noting.

How have you grown over the time you spent during lockdown?

I have gained more understanding for the need to have meaningful friends, connections and more revenue sources.

Mention at least one way you have treated friends better than family.

I can’t recall a specific situation because one thing is that; I have a hard time saying no to requests so I am usually someone who friends constantly come to for help.
My family rarely does but I always chip in when the need arises especially for functions and health issues.

What would you choose to make more time for?

Career growth

Do they call you by your name or you have a nickname? Do you like it or you just bear with it?

They call me by my name and it’s fine.

Lastly I saw this Tik tok trend, walk into your home stretch your hands out to any family member you meet and see their reaction. It’s either a hug or kicks and punches. It would be interesting to find out.

We are not the touchie lot so it would kinda feel weird.

Happy New Month to y’all ,thank you for joining in on this journey of Navigating Family during the Pandemic.
Feel free to share your experience in the comments section.

Catch me on the streets

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Family and the Pandemic 6

Hallo, thank you for accepting to take part in the family blog series.
So tell us, What  do you think makes a family?

I think two individuals make a family, sometimes three whether the third one is a pet or a person.

The important thing is dutiful love, not necessarily unconditional.

How would you best describe your family?

Your average God fearing family but one where somehow everyone is sarcastic for some reason and always finds a reason to laugh.

What kind of family structure do you come from?

Mainly nuclear but depending on the season it can be extended. I have many non-biological people that I call sister and brother because we have lived with them.

What are your earliest memories of home?

Earliest memory is of a time in the 90’s when my old people lived in a barracks in Mbale because of my dad’s work.
We had a small unit that I called home.

The memory is of me and other kids standing on a verandah because there was a electric leakage that caused the entire compound to become electrified. True story.

Another memory is of a terrifying old man that would cause all the barracks kids to scamper.

There was also a time I chased down a rabbit with my uncle, slaughtered it and used its skin to cushion a stool.

What do you most enjoy and appreciate about your family?

Firstly I appreciate the laughs we always have because my people are all humorous and I mean all. But mostly I appreciate the unique chemistry that we have. I find that not many families have that.
My parents are strict but very reasonable and understanding. Also the fact we are alive.

If you had a problem, Would you reach out to a friend or family member first and Why?

Depends on the problem. Friends require less explaining.
Like; I would always ask my family for emergency money unless it’s a very small amount or where it’s a deep mess that requires explanation.
Likewise, it would immediately become my friends’ problem if I overdosed on drugs or got a girl pregnant. Well I would not end up in such a situation in the first place, might not, but it’s a good example.

Let’s talk about navigating Family during the pandemic.

What positive and negative impact has this had on you and family ?

Weight gain and weight gain fears. That really sucked during the total lockdowns, we already had someone trying to lose weight before.
Some members might not have gained any weight but the mental pressure of knowing that you are eating while immobile, every molehill will look like a mountain.

Not to forget the constant fear that any fever, sniff or body weakness created covid19 scares.

Personally being home for long periods with every member of the house gives me occasional crankiness because I like personal space.

Would you consider that you have grown closer or apart from family during the pandemic?

We definitely grew closer. Sometimes I might distance myself because I am a bit more introverted than the rest but I think it only brought people closer.

Where have you put unrealistic expectations on your family?

I usually put unrealistic expectations on myself more than I’ve done for my family.
My siblings (biological) always seem to exceed my expectations.

Where have they put unrealistic expectations on you?

Lol, I should have known this question was in the offing. Long story short, I think they expected a practicing engineer out of me and I did deliver the degree but they got a creative instead.

Has your family let you be a grown up or they are still treating you like a child?

I guess I proved myself in the responsibility field, so I’m given the adult respect I deserve.
That doesn’t stop my old folks from giving me that parent-to-child direction whenever they seem it necessary.

Think of one thing that you said you would never do and you do it now.

A lot of the stuff is a tad bit sensitive. Maybe one thing I’ve learned is never to say never.
I used to say that I would never do certain stuff but I keep finding myself doing stuff I swore I’d never do.
Right now I live knowing anything can happen and I’m capable of anything.

In what ways has family shown you support  or not during the pandemic?

My dad has allowed me to continuously breathe the air in his house  during the pandemic so that’s awesome. But also, multiple times, I have been allowed or supported to the extent that they could go through with some of my creative endeavors.

Being stuck together/alone in the same space for a long period of time has its own challenges.
How have have you been intentional with having a time out?

I have left home once and stayed in a remote location for a week in order to decongest my brain and detox.

Does technology play a healthy or unhealthy role in your family?

Unhealthy A lot of the times in my opinion. I advocate against it wherever I can especially towards my younger siblings who seem to be hooked.
Once or twice I see them struggling with mental health issues and I can bet that their smartphones have a role to play in the mess.

My mom has also been a victim of fake WhatsApp/Facebook news multiple times.
It obviously got worse during the pandemic.

The technology that my dad interacts with is his button phone and TV during news time.

Give a short distinct description of what family time may look like in your household.

A Sunday might for instance involve my dad disappearing off after breakfast to do a vague description of work and come back later on to read newspapers until 9pm news.
My siblings are either watching movies, helping out cooking with Mom or something.

Other than dinner time, it would be playing board games like matatu while belittling each other’s performance in the game. Occasionally a local dodgeball type game ‘kibaale’ is played in the evenings.
It can only be described as a noisy affair. There are also evening prayers when we get together.

Describe a recent time you were angry at a family member and how did you handle it ?

My younger brother can be very emotional at times and short-tempered.
I always get angry at him for easily giving in to his emotions.
Whenever I do, I calm myself down, and have a stern conversation with him and teach him how to communicate and listen better.

Were you more intentional about spending time together?

Yes.

How have you grown over the time you spent during lockdown?

I’ve learnt to focus on what I want more. I am less swayed by what others want from me or think about me. But in a good way.

Mention at least one way you have treated friends better than family.

At the moment, I can’t remember any particular moment where I have.

What would you choose to make more time for?

I will always want more time to create and ultimately make my family proud.

Do they call you by your name or you have a nickname? Do you like it or you just bear with it?

My parents call me ‘kyenvu’ a lot especially when I can’t respond to my name. I’m cool with it. Another name that stuck was one my little sister would call me when she was an infant.
I find it uncomfortable sometimes that’s why it’s unmentioned here. It is limited to family members only because its now part of family.

Lastly I saw this Tik tok trend ,walk into your home stretch your hands out to any family member you meet and see their reaction.
It’s either a hug or kicks and punches.
It would be interesting to find out.

My family is full of huggers with no questions asked. I can predict.
After the hug they’ll think it’s my guilty conscience and start asking me things like what am I trying to steal from them or if there’s anything of theirs that I’ve messed up.

Thank you for Keeping up with the family series.
I see you and am grateful.

Catch me on the streets
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Twitter
https://twitter.com/DiaConnie?s=08
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Family and the Pandemic 5

Hallo, thank you for accepting to take part in the family blog series.

So tell us, What do you think makes a family?

People who are related and are committed to loving each other fully.

How would you best describe your family?

My family is the safest space, after God for me here on earth.

What kind of family structure do you come from?

Typical Nuclear family

What are your earliest memories of home?

I was a child with awesome siblings.
Our parents loved hosting friends and relatives over for good food and conversations.
Both our parents participated fully in our upbringing, we were allowed to play, visit friends and express ourselves fully.
Home was a peaceful and fun place to be at. We also used to travel to my mother’s village for the Christmas holidays. Time in the village was fun.

What do you most enjoy and appreciate about your family?

I enjoy the love, trust and accountability we share.
We are always rooting for each other. We are always protecting each other.
When you hurt one of us, you have hurt us all.

If you had a problem, would you reach out to a friend or family member first and Why?

I reach out to family first because that is the culture that has been instilled in us.
It is a crime for someone outside the 6 of us to know an issue that we do not know as a family. An issue that concerns one of us.

Let’s talk about navigating Family during the pandemic.

What positive and negative impact has this had on you and family?

Positively, the pandemic gave us more time to bond as a family, share stories and plans of transformation.
We love conversations and surely the pandemic strengthened this.
The pandemic also gave us an opportunity to love on other people physically with food and time. There is no negative impact.

Would you consider that you have grown closer or apart from family during the pandemic?

As a family, we have grown closer and closer. We care more about each other even on matters we had earlier ignored.

Where have you put unrealistic expectations on your family?

On celebrating my birthday. I always wish that my family holds a big party for me (insert laughing emoji) on each of my birthdays.
Yes, I am the kind that REALLY celebrates her birthday in a mega way and sometimes I expect my family to tag along but it is never the case.

Where have they put unrealistic expectations on you?

Sometimes, they expect me to be dating some of my closest friends.
I always laugh when they inquire in search for the truth. One rule we have at home is, “Always ask if you want to get the truth.” There is no room for assumptions.

Has your family let you be a grown up or they are still treating you like a child?

They do both. I am my family’s beloved hence I am babied 411. Yes, I am always a child at home and at the same time, I am respected, have the freedom to be me, do me and make personal decisions.

Think of one thing that you said you would never do and you do it now.

Eating food from my bedroom. I always said that I would never do that but hey, I just had my previous dinner from bed.

Think of one thing you said you would always do and don’t do it now.

Doing physical exercises daily. Thanks to my body losing weight so fast, I was demotivated and now I do like thrice a week.

In what ways has family shown you support during or not during the pandemic?

My family encourages me to keep pursuing my dreams and always affirm my spiritual gifts and talents.
They believe I am one of the best administrators one will ever find. They also read my blogs, social media posts and give feedback on my photographs.
They also help in doing back ground checks on my friends and also watch my friends on my behalf. They literally support me fully and love my friends.

Being stuck together/alone in the same space for a long period of time has its own challenges.
How have you been intentional with having a time out?

Personally, I am very loyal to my personal time.
During lockdown, I would play music and listen to it using headsets, this helped me escape into an outside world artistically.
This was all I could do because I am so cautious that I hated moving out.
When lockdown was lifted, I always have a schedule for where I want to go and be alone and I religiously follow the schedule.

Does technology play a healthy or unhealthy role in your family?

In my family, we mostly use technology for communication with the outside world and entertainment. So yes, it plays a healthy role.

If it is time for family conversations, we all turn off or put aside the technology gadgets and talk.

Give a short distinct description of what family time may look like in your household.

Family time in our household is us (mum and us her children) fully participating in preparing meals, sitting down to eat together at the same time and holding long conversations about different topics.

We also have hot seats for each of us at home, here we ask the hard questions with love and advise each other.
Each of us has a day to be on the hot seat including mum.

Describe a recent time you were angry at a family member and how did you handle it?

I was angry at my little sister for not responding to my question immediately. I later thought about the incidence deeply and noticed that she was going through a tough moment and therefore I let it go and forgave her.

Were you more intentional about spending time together?

Yes, the reason I returned home in 2017 after spending 11years away from home.

How have you grown over the time you spent during lockdown?

I have learned to be more open to new ideas. I always disliked bright colors for any item. My mum recently convinced me to own colored bedsheets and I gave the idea a try.
I now own an orange pair of bedsheets.

Mention at least one way you have treated friends better than family.

I cannot recall of any. The things I do for my friends are the things I do for my family.

What would you choose to make more time for?

I would choose to make more time for friends vis-a-vis work.

Do they call you by your name or you have a nickname? Do you like it or you just bear with it?

I am called by a short form of my name.
By the way, only and only my family is permitted to call me by that name.
While growing up, I had a nickname that made me laugh each time I remembered it was mine.

Lastly I saw this TikTok trend, walk into your home stretch your hands out to any family member you meet and see their reaction.

Touch is not a family love language so I did not risk because I hate being ignored.

Join in on following the ongoing family series. Feel free to share your own experiences.

Catch me on the streets.

https://www.facebook.com/connie.ahebssaxi
Twitter
https://twitter.com/DiaConnie?s=08
Instagram : Connie Dia

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