I hope as we read through this short interview from the different Men. We saw Differences, Patterns, Similarities etc.
Today we interview the last Gentleman as we await the Finale.
Thank you to those following, Stick around to the End.
What’s your name and where do you come from?
My name is Valentine Makoni and I come from Harare, Zimbabwe.
What are some of the things you remember most about your father ?
(If you knew him or a father figure in your life)
My father loved photography. From a young age, my father was the “camera guy”. Remember, this was in the 90’s and early 2000s.
There were no digital cameras or smart phones. So, it was exceptional for him to have a camera.
At every family function: weddings, birthday parties, engagement parties, Christmas gatherings… my father would be there with his camera. Our house was full of photo albums when I was young.
My father has a dual personality almost.
A public one, and a private one.
At home, he has always been quiet and reflective. Watching news on TV, reading the newspaper, running, washing the car.
He would speak, but sparingly. In public, he would laugh, do speeches, connect and generally be very extroverted.
I started to understand his quiet times as a means for him to recharge emotionally for the moments he has to be engaging in public.
What was a random compliment that someone gave you and stuck with you ?
You sound learned. I was having a social conversation with a girl and she said, “you speak like someone who is well read. Who knows a lot. I like that when talking to you.”
Its stuck with me a lot.
Sometimes wondering if its true.
Sometimes as pressure to live up. Sometimes as a reminder that knowledge is not only what we get through diplomas and degrees.
What is the worst thing and best thing about being Male?
The best thing about being male is… time.
I have often felt like being “left behind” by my peers. On things such as having a degree / a job / a place to stay / a wife. But, being male seems to give me a lot of time.
I have time to make mistakes. To think. To grow. To decide.
As hard as it is, to decide to do things on my own terms, in my own time.
The worst thing about being male is having a broken relationship with the female gender.
In the words of Kendrick Lamar: “We do it all for a woman from haircut to a war.”
We like to live in the jungle like to play in the peach” It is limiting to design a whole life around acquiring / getting / impressing women, but its tempting to do so.
Is there anything you had wished you asked your dad and you didn’t?
I guess, I wished I had talked to him more. Just, in general. About nothing in particular.
People in general have a way of revealing their personality and wisdom in conversation, and he does that very well.
Do you have a role model or idol and who is it?
Honestly, I have never had a single “role model” or “idol”.
I watch, learn and like things from a whole range of people, each with their own… way.
But, Kendrick Lamar could be the closest to it. I resonate with his honesty and creativity.
What is your definition of a real man ?
A real man is one who… is in control of himself. There are a lot of pressures from family, society, capitalism, impulses, governments, friends, peers, women.
A real man is one who can define truth for himself and be able to live within that truth.
What are your thoughts on Discipleship, Mentorship for Men ? Is it something you are open to?
I think discipleship / mentorship for men is an interesting concept worth exploring.
There can be some learning and companionship that comes from it.
However, its not something I would be *personally* open to.
I just have a preference for non-formal learning and association.
When last where you vulnerable and opened up to someone?
In December 2020, after feeling overwhelmed through my mental health, I wrote a public post on Facebook.
I have found it helpful to be vulnerable and open in my writing, even when I share this writing on a public forum.
What is the one thing you think every man should experience?
Happiness. Every man should know what happiness means to them. Where they can forget everything else and just be in a moment and happy. Its good to know what that is like.
Besides religion and politics, what other topic gets heated amongst your friends during conversation.
Sports, women and money. Top 3, easily lol.
If you had an opportunity to teach your child, brother, friend ? What would you teach them?
I would teach them to be in tune with themselves. What do they think? What do they want? What do they fear? What do they feel?
What is your phone wall paper? (Screenshot)
The standard phone wall paper lol. I never change it tbh.
What quote has stuck with you?
Adulting is soup. And I am fork.
